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| He was going for an elegant shot for his dating profile. |
Sometimes, when I've had an off day, I like to look at pictures of roosters on the internet. And then I have a nice giggle fit. Because I'm basically a giant child. And so yesterday, when I was sitting around, just browsing rooster photos to enliven myself, I thought I would brighten your day with a hearty helping of cock and a fun fact.
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| "I'm so rustic right now. You don't even know." - Rooster McPants-McManahan |
Fun fact: Lady chickens can eject rooster sperm if they decide they've got something better going on.
Well, hold the phone. That sounds like a damn handy skill. Every once in a while, I learn an animal fact that really makes me doubt the benefits of my species. Sure, I have thumbs, but who needs thumbs when you're a bird? Flying around, pecking out eyes, ejecting sperm....
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| This is what I like to imagine roosters look like in the post-apocalyptic hellscape we've been promised. |
Also, as a bonus fun fact, I'd like you to know that when roosters try and woo the ladies, they do a little rooster dance. Which is called tidbitting. And then the hens are all sitting around saying, "Damn, look at Frankfurt tidbit! I wish I weren't already spermed up courtesy of Ralph. He can't tidbit like that!" And then they don't have to have Ralph's sperm because they eject the sperm! And can get with Frankfurt. Or someone else. Because there are 25 billion chickens in the world. So why settle?
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| "No one has to settle. I'm here." - Henry T. Pompadour |
You don't have to settle either, dear reader. There's a whole wide world out there. And if all else fails, there's an internet full of roosters.
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