Fun Fact Friday - Five Years of Sweetheartache

I discovered today that when one is looking for fun facts about love, dating, and smooching to share with her very dearest reader, she will also find a somewhat significant number of facts about serial killers and homicides. I will not be sharing one of those facts with you today. They have their place, but not on a holiday that stems from Roman beliefs about bird mating habits and disparate Catholic stories of beheaded priests. No, today is a day for romance.

Fun Fact: The shelf life of Sweethearts is five years.

The worst part of any Valentine's Day.

If you enjoy sugary chalk and sending mixed messages, you may enjoy Sweethearts. And just think, you could be enjoying your Sweethearts long after your relationship with whoever gave them to you has turned sour. It's probably for the best. After all, they gave you candy hearts for Valentine's Day.

You deserve better than candy hearts, dear reader. Sometimes they say things like "AS IF," "NO WAY," and "LET'S DO LUNCH." Lunch? Really? That stings.

Five years of suffering.

And then there are the hearts that say "FAX ME." I don't know about you, dear reader, but no one has ever faxed me on Valentine's Day. And Sweethearts are just a cruel reminder. A cruel, five year long reminder.

So instead of terrible hearts from the very confectioners who still haven't improved on their Necco Wafer recipe since the Civil War, I got you this fun fact about the selfsame heart-shaped sweets, dear reader. Because what we have means that much to me.

I also got you this picture of a Sweetheart. It hasn't even been smudged off, so I'm not playing mind games with you.

Happy Valentine's Day, dear reader. You're better than Sweethearts.

And you smell fantastic.